I Can't Believe It
by Airplanes as Shooting Stars
Summary: Mikan sees something that makes her do something bad. What did she see? Was it that bad?


(**A/N:** Hey there fanfiction readers. I bring you another story. It may me a little dark, but I hope you would still like it. This story would be mostly told in Mikan's POV.)

Disclaimer: I own nothing. All rights go the wonderful Higuchi Tachibana.

**Title: I Can't Believe It**

_**Mikan's POV**_

Blood. That was the first thing I saw when I opened my eyes. There I was lying on a puddle of blood, which was dripping from my wrist. I groggily stood up, and walked to the bathroom. I remembered I slit my left wrist a few hours ago. I grabbed the first aid kit and headed to the couch. I settled down on the couch and silently worked on my wrist; stitching it up and bandaging it tightly. I was already done and cleaning up the kit when I had the sudden urge to walk outside. It was already 10 in the evening, so I knew it was perfectly safe to walk outside without bumping into _him_. So I grabbed my jacket and rushed to the door, not bothering to clean up the blood-stained floor nor did I lock the door.

**(**◕ ‿ ◕**)**

As I stepped outside, a cold gush of wind gently hit my face. I clutched unto my jacket even more for warmth, as I started my journey to wherever my feet took me. As I walked through the dark, silent night, I couldn't help but remember what happened this morning.

**(**◕ ‿ ◕**)**

_**Flashback**_

_It was a sunny afternoon, a perfect day for a walk. It was around 12 in the afternoon when I stepped out of the dormitories. I walked, or rather skipped to the Sakura tree hoping to see my oh-so-handsome boyfriend, Natsume, there. As I got nearer and nearer to my destination I saw someone already sitting there, with someone else sitting on his/her lap. I couldn't figure out who it was so I kept walking towards them, hoping to ask if they've seen my boyfriend. _

_I was about 5 meters from them when I finally realized who they were. I was shocked that I literally froze on the spot. Right in front of me was my own boyfriend, with Luna Koizumi sitting on his lap, giggling. I was probably frozen on that spot for a few minutes because Koizumi finally noticed me, and what did she do? She whispered something to Natsume which made him turn his head towards me, smirking. Our eyes locked for a few seconds, and as if on cue he turned his head and made-out with Koizumi. I couldn't believe it; my own boyfriend was making-out with another girl right in front me. That was my trigger, I snapped out of my trance and ran as fast as my legs could to the safest haven I could think of, my room. _

_It felt as though I had just run a marathon by the time I had arrived at my room. I was so tired from running really fast and my chest felt as though it was going to burst any minute. I closed my door and locked it and jumped on my bed, releasing all the tears I didn't know I held back. I cried and cried; I didn't even know I had that much tears. _

_I just laid there in bed, bawling my eyes out. My chest felt as though it was carrying the world's heaviest load. _

_I must have fallen asleep while crying, because when I woke up and looked at my alarm clock, it read '7:00'._

' _I had fallen asleep'. I thought. But even with all that crying and sleeping the heavy pain was still there. The image of them kissing was still haunting my thoughts. The pain was becoming unbearable, I don't even know if I could live through this. _

_As if on cue I remembered a conversation I heard a few weeks back. A group of probably depressed girls was talking about slitting their wrists. They said it 'relieved' their pain. _

_At that time I would have never even think about what they said, but now I was actually considering the thought. I laid there on my bed, staring at the ceiling, dried tears stained my cheeks, and just thought about what I should do to relieve the heavy pain I was feeling._

_After probably a few minutes I had made my decision. The pain was just unbearable and I had nothing to lose anyway. So I got out of my bed and searched for a blade, a knife or even a cutter. I searched high and low; finally I had found one. _

_I settled myself on the couch. As I looked at the blade in my hand I hesitated a bit. I closed my eyes, silently debating with myself whether to go through with this or not. As I closed my eyes, the picture of Natsume and Luna entered my mind. The silent debate ended almost immediately. _

_I looked at the door to double check if it was locked; I don't want anyone barging in when I'm actually doing it. _

_I grasped the blade in my hand, and slowly neared it to my wrist. A few seconds of hesitation and I finally did it, I slit my wrist. I watched intently as the blood flowed from the cut. As I watched, I felt as though all the pain was flowing out with the blood. For the first time in hours I actually felt somewhat relieved. _

_I cut a few more times, when I finally felt drowsy. I decided I was done for today. So I stood up to walk to the bathroom to clean the wound. _

_My vision somewhat blurred when I stood up. I couldn't walk straight too. It looked as though I was walking like a drunken man. Halfway to the bathroom I fell to the floor in a loud thud. _

_Drowsiness was taking over my body, probably because of blood lose. I lay there on the floor unmoving, deciding to let sleep take over me. And everything turned black._

**(**◕ ‿ ◕**)**

'And then I woke up.' I thought.

I looked around, hoping to figure out where I had led myself too. Only to realize my feet took me to the Sakura tree.

It was the same Sakura tree where I had found my boyfriend cheating on me. I decided to sit down, and look up at the beautiful night sky.

The sky was covered with twinkling stars as the moon hung low. As I looked at endless dark sky, I remembered the times when me and Natsume would just sit under this tree and cherish our time together. Neither one of us saying anything, for us not to ruin the moment.

As all those memories - sweet memories- came rushing back to me, the pain was with it. The horrible and unbearable pain was building up inside of me again, and I needed a release.

So I stood up, dusted my skirt, and calmly walked to my room.

Halfway through my room, I saw _him_. There he was standing, his back facing me. He might have felt my presence because he suddenly turned towards me.

He started calling my name and walked calmly towards me. But the pain inside me increased tenfold and I badly needed release. So I did the first thing that I could think of 'run'.

I ran as fast as I can, away from him.

I was well aware he was running after me. I could still hear him shouting my name over and over again. But I was persistent on not seeing his face.

So I ran faster, intending to run away from him. When I finally arrived at my door, I didn't stop for a moment.

I opened the door, got inside and slammed it close, locking it. A few moments later, repetitive loud banging was heard on my door. I dared not to open the door, knowing fully well Natsume was on the other side.

**(**◕ ‿ ◕**)**

_**Natsume's POV (outside the door)**_

"Polka, open this door now. Mikan, I know you're in there." I kept on banging on her door hoping for her to open it.

I was probably shouting louder than I thought because after a minute or two, heads of sleepy people poked out of their bedroom door, curious about what the ruckus was about.

Seeing as though it was only me, they all disappeared inside their bedrooms once again, with the exception of our friends.

Imai, Ruka, Permy, Koko, Anna, Nonoko, Yuu and Kitsume all headed towards me; with looks of annoyance and determination.

I heard Ruka sigh before questioning. "What did you do this time?"

Rolling my eyes, "I don't even know. I just saw her walking when I almost approached her she started running. And now this, she locked herself inside."

Imai, with a look of irritation etched on her face exclaimed, "Give her until tomorrow to explain. The idiot should at least have a good reason for waking me up at 12 in the morning."

We were all walking away, when a heard a thud coming from Polka's room.

'To hell with it.' And I kicked open the door. What I saw nearly made me faint. Behind me the gang all had shocked expressions, even Imai.

**(**◕ ‿ ◕**)**

_**(Mikan's POV)**_

"Polka, open this door now. Mikan, I know you're in there." I heard Natsume shout on the other side.

No matter how much shouting he'll do I would never open that door. As I hurried off to find my blade, I could still hear him shouting.

I stood in the middle of my blood-stained floor, without hesitation, I slit my wrist. Again and again, I did it, not minding the drowsiness seeping through me.

As I kept on slitting I heard a few murmurs and then footsteps walking away, I smiled before fainting, creating a loud 'thud', then everything turned black.

**(**◕ ‿ ◕**)**

_**Natsume's POV (again)**_

As fast as I was shocked, I snapped out of it and ran to her, Imai was right behind me. I traced where the blood was coming from.

She had slit her wrist. The idiot had slit her wrist.

Imai sensing I was angry, no furious said, "No time to get mad Hyuuga. Come on help me fix her before she loses too much blood."

She was right. This was so not the right time for my anger.

So I laid her head down on my lap as Imai got the first aid. Imai worked in silence.

When she was done, I carried Polka's boy bridal style onto her bed, laying her down gently.

I grabbed a chair and sat down next to her bed. I looked to my right and there stood the gang.

I sighed "Go to bed. I'll tell you about it tomorrow or should I say later."

Understanding the meaning they silently filed out the room.

**(**◕ ‿ ◕**)**

_**Mikan's POV (7 in the morning)**_

I shot my eyes open, waking up from the darkness, expecting to wake up on the floor. Only to realize I was on my bed, not bleeding.

I uneasily sat up on my bed, looking around in the process. I noticed everything was in place only that I was not on the floor. Looking to my right I saw Natsume fast asleep.

He looked so peaceful when he's asleep. I neared my hand unto his cheek, only to be stopped when he grabbed unto my wrist, before it even touched his cheek.

I felt heat creep up on my cheeks with contact of our hands, but I controlled it. "What are you doing here?" I angrily questioned him, although knowing fully well he would not answer it.

"Why did you slit your wrist?" I seriously had that coming.

I glared at him, "That's none of your business Hyuuga."

I knew he was surprised but being him, he didn't show it, "It's my business since you're my girlfriend, Polka. Will you just answer the question?"

That did it. The tears were once again falling; only this time he was there to witness it. "You want answers? Fine. I only did it because I was hurt. Damn hurt because of you."

He was surprised; that I knew "Me? What did I do know?"

I wasn't mad anymore; I was furious "Don't play dumb with me Hyuuga. I saw you kissing Koizumi. I was there. You honestly think I would buy your innocent act?"

"What are you talking about baka? I was never with Koizumi."

I couldn't take it anymore; I slapped him, hard, "I don't believe you. I saw you with my own eyes, Natsume. If you don't have proof then I'm …breaking up with you." I looked away before he could see my tears again.

Silence. There was complete utter silence after what I said. A couple of moments later I heard typing. I turned to look at Natsume to see him texting someone; probably his slut of a girlfriend.

There was a part of me that honestly wished he wasn't texting that whore. Honestly wishing he was texting someone to help him get me back.

Won over by my curiosity I asked him, "Who are you texting? Koizumi? Are you like texting her to tell her I broke up with you so you two could make-out again?"

That caught his attention. He turned to look at me for a few second, his face stoic, and then turned back to his phone again.

'I give up.' I thought. I wouldn't be able to get him to tell me who he was texting.

Remembering what I said I told him, "Well if you don't have any more business here, you may now leave Hyuuga." Surprisingly he didn't do anything. He just sat there, looking like he was waiting for something.

Apparently my guess was right. A few minutes later Hotaru and Ruka came barging into my room dragging Koizumi along with them. I was shocked and that was an understatement.

They sat her on a chair and tied her arms at her back, securing it tightly. I couldn't take my eyes off of the scene but I saw from the corner of my eyes Natsume standing up and headed to Koizumi.

There was silence for a few moments before Natsume broke it, "Alright Koizumi spit it out. I know you did something that could make that baka think I kissed you."

Koizumi smirked before replying, "And what if don't? What are you going to do?"

"Well let's just say that you're going to say bye-bye to your hair forever."

I noticed that her smile faltered for a split second then change to a fake one. 'I guess Natsume's just that intimidating.'

There was a tint of smugness in the words she said next like she was doubting Natsume if he can do it or not, "As if you would ever do that."

Natsume had that coming; I knew it from that mischievous glint in his eyes. He smirked then created a flame on his palm before replying, "Try me."

That did it; I saw Luna crack and break her fake smile. She frowned and finally confessed, "Okay fine, I did do something. I just asked some dude who had the shape shift alice to shape shift into Natsume to trick Sakura there,"

She wasn't done; that I knew. She was going to say something else that might want me to rip her gut out. I was right; smirking, she continued, "And I guess it worked. I honestly thought she wouldn't believe it; I guess she doubts your relationship too much that she would actually believe it."

I was right. I was infuriated with what she said. I was going to stand up and give her a piece of my mind when a hard slapping sound stopped me. I looked over at Natsume and Luna. I saw this big red hand mark on her cheek from Natsume's slap.

I looked over at him; he sighed before threatening, "Don't you ever say that again, ever."

I saw the fear creeping into her; he looked over to Hotaru and Ruka, "Take this whore out. Do whatever to her, I don't care just take her out of my sight." I was stunned, I didn't even notice that those two where still there.

Once again the room was silent with just me and Natsume in it. I was humiliated; I thought what I saw was real, turned out it was a lie.

I couldn't face him; after what I said to him who wouldn't. So I was fairly surprised when he took hold of my chin and tilt it up so that we were seeing each other eye-to-eye.

He smirked, I blushed, "There I gave you my proof; guess that means you're still mine."

I chuckled before looking him straight in the eye again, "You sly cat. But I'm sorry…for accusing you."

I expected a sly remark; I was surprised when he kissed me. It was a slow and passionate kiss. Almost like a reminder that he would never do hurt me.

I slowly melted into the kiss like he wanted me to. We stayed like that for a few minutes before breaking apart for much needed air.

He looked at me straight in the eye, "You know I love you and I would never do anything to hurt you."

I smiled, a genuine smile, "I love you too."

And it was once again sealed with a passionate kiss.

THE END

Finished. I hope you like it. Please drop a review. Thanks again for reading.


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